Which is apparently what I just wrote. Inspired by Elf's post and the responses. I couldn't resist.
Draco’s Amor
A ficlet, in which Draco falls in love with somebody you might not expect…
Warnings: This fic contains scenes of bloodletting and BDSM.
This fic contains character death.
This fic contains anger and characters playing footsies.
This fic contains a snake.
This fic contains Draco wearing Gryffindor-colored clothing.
This fic contains rats, bugs, and monkeys.
A puppy is kicked in this fic.
Improper use of English grammar is used in this fic.
This story takes place in modern-day New York and Draco is actually American in this fic.
Harry is not in this fic.
This fic contains a female character who does not shave her legs. Read at your own discretion.
Sweeney Todd makes a surprise appearance in this fic, with his razors. Be warned.
This fic may or may not take place on an island in the Indian Ocean and there may or may not be a hatch with a button that has to be pressed every couple hours.
Draco sings Broadway showtunes in this fic while in the shower.
Draco visits a farm and touches a cow in this fic. He is also chased by a chicken.
Enough with the warnings already…and now, on with the fic!
Draco had always known he was a little bit different. He woke up in his Manhattan loft and looked out the window to see---Oh damn, I ran out of paper to write this…Oh well…
And he lived happily ever after.
The End